


The Worst Birthday Ever [Timestamp Fic]

by WinchesterPooja (chronic_potterphile)



Series: Holly [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Mental Disorders, Cuddling & Snuggling, Gen, Holly - Freeform, Kidfic, Sam has a daughter, Swearing, Tears, Timestamp, Toddler Winchester, Two-Shot, samndean - Freeform, season 7
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-02
Updated: 2015-07-02
Packaged: 2018-04-07 08:42:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4256874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chronic_potterphile/pseuds/WinchesterPooja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Dean's birthday, and Holly wants Sam and Dean to take her outside to the park. Is anything ever that simple in a Winchester's life, though?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Screw-Up

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> First of all, I would like to thank and eternally huggle the awesome, awesome Naila for her wonderful art for this series, and her support, and Sanjana, because she's my angel.
> 
> To anyone who's read 'It Was a Dark and Stormy Night', yesss, this is another Holly fic. :D A companion, and I hope you'll like this just as much! To all new readers - this is based on a 'verse where Sam finds out he has a daughter with one of the women he hooked up with, while he was soulless. The fic is set during season 7, after episode 7.16, 'Out With the Old'.
> 
> This fic is only warned for swearing, and canon mental disorders. Other than that, it's not dark or anything, and I hope you enjoy reading Holly with the boys, because I sure as hell love writing her, and am unabashed to admit it. :) Either ways, I do think they all need some extra cuddling in their lives, haha.
> 
> There's no beta, though. So all mistakes are mine. Also, there seems to be a slight mistake with the Missing Persons' thing. Please take that with a pinch of salt because I'm not American, and it doesn't really make a big difference to the plot anyway. I'm sorry if it bothers you, though.

 

Art by [Naila](http://chesterbennington.co.vu/).

 

____

 

"Dammit," Sam cursed, running across the pebbled pathway in the park. Sweat beaded on his forehead and his philtrum as he waited for Dean's phone call, hoping his brother had some answers. The baby sling hung from his chest, the straps loose and cutting through his shoulders, and he paused midway to pull it off and held it in his hand as he continued to run.

His heart was racing in his chest and a feeling of utter fear and foreboding bubbled in his gut as he made his way to the precise bench where he and Dean had been sitting with Holly. As he had feared, (and kinda expected), it was deserted. Sam let out a huff of frustration and reached for his hair, only to the find clothespins there, holding bunches of his hair in little ponytails.

He pulled a couple of them off, feeling helpless and angry. His chest also constricted in fear.

"Dammit," he muttered again. He knew it. He just knew it. He knew he'd screw up. He'd been screwing up too many things of late and he should have known he'd mess this up too. But Holly… Holly was just a baby. How could he have done this? How could he have been so horrible at this?

A lump formed in his throat and he took a deep breath, before swallowing it down. No, no. He had to concentrate. He had to take care of this. Oh God, oh God… how on earth could he have been so careless?

His phone rang in his pocket. Sam picked it up and glanced at Dean's name, before taking the call. "Anything?" he asked breathlessly to his brother, staring unconsciously at the baby sling in his hand.

"Sam… I c-can't… did you…?" Dean took a breath, and Sam knew Dean's answer, just from his question.

His heart sank. Dean was saying something on the other side — something frantic, but Sam wasn't listening. Holly wasn't  _here_. Oh God. Holly wasn't here. Their last resort — the last place they could look, and…

"Sammy?" Dean asked suddenly, stopping in the middle of his talk. He didn't say anything, but Sam could hear his unspoken question.

"She's not here, Dean," Sam replied in a small voice. He paused. There was no use denying it. He took a small breath, and his voice shook as he spoke. "Dean, Holly is missing. I lost her."

**~o~**

**_Two hours ago_ **

"Fammy!"

"Yeah, baby." Sam smiled down at the little, squirming figure bundled up and strapped to his chest, and was rewarded with large, sunflower green eyes blinking back at him. The air was bitingly cold, and Holly had been bored enough to climb the walls back at the cabin, because they hadn't been able to get her out to play in a few days. She had gotten screechy and cranky, and she'd started crying for her mom again, which made it all a disaster-in-waiting.

As the only solution they could think of, Sam and Dean had tucked her into a fuckload of sweaters and blankets over her warmest onesie, and then a cap, before getting her outside, making the crying and shrieking stop altogether. They knew Holly tended to get frustrated in the restriction of the cabin sometimes, but she'd been recently sick, and Sam and Dean hadn't wanted to take her out in the cold. But, it looked like venturing out today was a good idea. Holly was definitely happy about the outing, since she hadn't stopped babbling ever since they'd begun to walk to the park.

Sam raised a gloved hand and pushed back a strand of hair from Holly's eye. "You enjoying?"

"Deaa balayayay!" she replied excitedly.

"Yeah," Sam grinned to his brother who was walking beside him. "It's Dean's birthday." It was January the twenty-fourth, meaning Dean was now thirty-five. He was nonchalant about it, though — it wasn't as though Sam or Dean really celebrated their birthdays, after all. Sam had gotten Dean apple pie with a candle on it — their usual Dean-birthday tradition, and he had gifted Dean a new pair of jeans. Apart from that, there had not been much celebration. In fact, the only person who was really excited about this was Holly.

"Aaavi gaga," Holly said in a very matter-of-factly tone, and Dean sniggered.

"Sure, munchkin," he replied. Sam glanced at him again, to see Dean's lips twitch some more, and he could make out that his brother was keeping from outright laughing. Sometimes, they could make out what Holly meant, but then there were other times — times like this, when her babble only ever made sense to her.

"There are only two people on this planet who are allowed to invent words, apparently," Dean said fondly, as they entered the park, "that Shakespeare dude, and this one." He extended a hand and placed it on Holly's head.

"Well, she is a Winchester," Sam reminded Dean. "Apparently, our family can do all kinds of stuff."

"Legit," Dean replied, prodding Holly's cheek with his finger, to earn himself a dimpled smile from her. "She'd probably cute Satan back to his cage."

"Or scream in his ear," Sam replied. "Either ways, she'd do it better—" He stopped, when he saw the look on Dean's face. His previously jolly brother was frowning at him, and Sam put his arms around Holly, before turning a questioning expression to Dean.

"Don't say that," Dean said quietly, before Sam could ask. "I know it was all fucked-up, Sammy," he continued, and Sam licked his lip, trying to look away, because, fuck, the shit he had done — soulless — and before that, with the demon blood and Ruby…

"Sam," said Dean, interrupting his thoughts, and Sam looked up to see earnest green eyes looking into his. "You did good, okay?" He paused. "Don't make me punch you now."

"Dean—"

"You get me?" Dean asked him, seriously, stopping briefly in his steps.

Sam sighed, and nodded. Dean nodded back, and smiled lightly. "Good. Now," he turned to Holly, "where do you wanna sit, munchkin?"

**~o~**

"I'm going to throw these clothespins away. Burning the shit out of 'em. I swear," Dean muttered as he stared ahead of him, at the shining heaps of snow, scattered over the landscape in front of them. He moved his head, to look at Sam, but was interrupted by Holly.

"Deaaaaaa!" she protested, her little hand going to clutch at a bunch of his hair.

"Ow! Okay, sorry," Dean sighed, and continued to look straight. Beside him, Sam sniggered.

"Laugh, bitch," Dean told his brother. "It's gonna be your turn soon."

"But it's not right now, is it?" Sam replied, as he continued to chuckle. "Man, those ponytails are just precious on you."

Dean strategically flipped him off, so Holly wouldn't see. Sam just continued to enjoy the view.

Holly had chosen a park bench for them and once they'd settled, she'd asked for her toys — her bunny and her beach ball, which Dean had stuffed into a bag for her, before they'd brought her out. Turned out, Holly had made an addition to the bag, and it was for her favourite pastime — the one that Sam and Dean dreaded the most. The moment Dean had opened the bag for her, she had thrust her hand in and pulled out the clothespins with a big grin, and then proceeded to stand behind him on the bench, so she could play with his hair and make those wretched ponytails (which were so fucking pointless — because Dean's hair never held, and Holly never seemed to give up). Both Sam and Dean knew that Sam's turn was next.

Presently, Holly's shoes squeaked as she moved a little, and grasped at another tuft of Dean's hair. She noticed the squeak and stomped her foot once on the bench, giggling. She loved these shoes. They weren't amongst the stuff that Sam and Dean had got her — but she usually insisted on wearing them. They made noise, and they were incredibly loud and very pink and flowery.

"I'm burning those too," Dean muttered to Sam, as Holly stomped her foot again and laughed at the squeak.

"Don't forget to salt them," Sam uttered back, but Dean found himself smiling, while Holly made her shoes squeak a couple more times, before concentrating on his hair again.

"She's  _my_  niece," he told Sam fondly. "She has to be badass and awesome at the same time."

"You're not awesome," Sam replied. "And she can be exactly as annoying as you can be, so yeah, she is definitely  _your_  niece."

"Of course I'm awesome," said Dean, rolling his eyes. Holly tugged at his hair again, and he cleared his throat. "You almost done there, baby girl?"

"No," Holly replied sternly.

"Make it quick," Dean told her. "Or it will be dark before you can get to Sam's hair."

"'Olly Fammy poviyay," she declared, letting go of Dean's hair. She held on to his shoulders as she slowly began to squat behind him, her face coming out from behind him to peer at his.

Dean twisted around and plucked her from her place, to rest her on his lap. He reached for the bag where they'd kept her blankets. "You cold?"

"No," Holly said, trying to stand up on his lap and Dean let her, grabbing her from under her armpits to support her. She took a toddling step forward and put her arms around his neck, resting her cheek on his shoulder.

Dean placed his hand on her back. "You're tired."

"Noooo." She pulled away and peered at him, eyes huge beneath long eyelashes. "No jo-jo."

"Hey, if you fall asleep after saying you won't, we're leaving you here," Dean teased, cupping her cheek and planting a kiss on her temple.

"Deaaaaa!"

"Holly!"

"No, Deaa!" she said, and she looked up at him. "Deaa yuv 'Olly." She seemed extremely confident about it.

Dean's heart melted. "Yeah, I know," he replied. Then he smiled. "I was kidding, okay? But are you sleepy?"

"No jo-jo," Holly repeated.

Dean sighed, and thumbed her cheek. "Okay. Can I at least undo these ponytails?"

"No!" Holly pouted. She turned to Sam, and held out her arms. "Fammy!"

Sam smiled and leaned forward, looping an arm around her waist. "Come here." He lifted her off Dean's lap and she reached up to touch his dimple. She did that a lot, and Dean was glad she did, because it made Sam smile longer and harder.

Sam leaned forward, letting her tiny fingers brush against his cheek, and then, like a sly bastard, pointed at the baby sling. "Walk?"

Holly was too good for him, though. She simply shook her head. "No. 'Olly Fammy poviyay."

_Holly Sammy ponytail._

**~o~**

They left the park an hour and a half later, Sam and Dean both sporting ponytails that Holly wouldn't let them undo. Sam had tried, but she'd started crying, and then he'd just bundled her up and held her, promising that he would keep them.

Of course, that had been a very bad idea, because now, as Sam and Dean walked back to the cabin with Holly in Dean's arms, people were casting very strange glances their way. Some seemed to realise the cause of the ponytails, though, and they cast glances at Holly and either quietly ' _aww'_ d, or smiled in amusement at Sam and Dean's plight.

Sam felt good, though. Light-hearted. The ponytails were embarrassing, but he didn't care so much, because they seemed to make Holly very happy. This was also like a reassurance of Holly's fondness for him, and it made everything around him seem a lot warmer.

He had always wanted a normal life, but he'd never thought he'd admire this cockamamie of a normal-weird life he was leading with Holly and his brother right now. It seemed to lighten all the crap he had faced in the past, and after all the trouble Sam had gone through for this, this situation was perfect for where he was, and his life right now. He couldn't have hoped for anything better.

"Sam," Dean called out from beside him, breaking Sam out of his reverie.

"Yeah," Sam replied, turning to his brother.

"You wanna get some beers after putting the firecracker to sleep? We can sit on Baby's hood — it's gonna be dark soon."

Sam considered it. Sitting on the hood of the Impala and looking at stars while he and Dean shared beers and teased and insulted each other — it had been an old tradition; a tradition long gone; ever since Sam had leapt into Hell, because they'd barely had time in the debacles their lives had become. But… now, they hadn't been hunting a while — and had decided not to hunt until they knew how to manage it with Holly in their lives.

He felt a rush of nostalgia. "Sure, Dean."

Dean grinned at him. "I'll go get us a six-pack. You take this one back to the cabin." He extracted Holly from himself and extended an armful of her to hand over to Sam.

Sam beckoned to Holly. "Come on, sweetheart."

"No!" she protested, moving closer to Dean.

"Dean's got some work," Sam told her. "I'll take you home." He gestured to the sling, still hanging loosely at his chest.

"No!" she replied. "'Olly wum!"

"Okay," Sam sighed. "You can walk along." Evidently, she was still mad at him for trying to get the ponytails off. Sam's heart sank a little. Holly was a kid and this was of small consequence, but something prickled inside of him whenever she got mad at him. He hated it.

Dean set Holly on the ground and handed over her bags to Sam, who slung them over his shoulder, as she wobbled over to his side and started walking, shoes squeaking discordantly, in a faltering rhythm. Dean waved goodbye and rounded a corner, where he no doubt, would undo the ponytails, before going for the beers.

Sam glanced at Holly and continued to walk, listening to the squeaks, until…

**Oh, look whose little baby doesn't love him anymore!**

Sam huffed at Lucifer, who appeared suddenly at his other side, and looked ahead. "Come on, Holly," he said, but he couldn't really walk quicker, because he wanted her to keep up.

The journey to the cabin was painful, with Lucifer passing snide comments in Sam's ear, and Sam was very relieved to get to the cabin, so he could concentrate on other things, and put Holly to sleep. He watched Holly waddle-run into the cabin after him, before going over and sitting her on the bed, so he could get her shoes off. She grinned at him, then, and extended a hand to his dimple, and that was when Sam knew that all was forgiven.

He smiled at Holly, and let her dig her finger into the dimple. "We'll get you into a warm bath," he told her, "and then you can have your milk and sleep, okay?"

"Otay," she agreed. She pressed his dimple again, and took her hand off, before yawning once.

"Aw, you're tired?" Sam asked her, taking the cap off and ruffling her hair.

"Jo-jo," she agreed. She yawned again.

"Okay," he said, setting her down. "Give me a minute, then. Let me get the warm water running. You can play until then."

He quickly got to the bathroom to fill the tub for Holly, because her acceptance of tiredness suggested that she was about to be snoozing in t-minus-ten, and Sam didn't want her sleeping on an empty stomach.

The water began to fill the small bathtub and when he bent over to test it, Sam realised that he was still wearing the baby sling. Sighing, he got out to put it on the bed, only to glance towards Holly's island of toys, and not find her there. He frowned, and turned to her crib, but he knew he hadn't put her in there. He looked anyway, and but she wasn't there.

Sam was going to call out to her, but then he noticed something. "No," he whispered, rushing to the doorway to the cabin. The wooden door was ajar.

"No, no, no," Sam muttered again. He had shut the door as he'd come in, hadn't he? He had held it open for Holly and she'd run in and…

Had Sam shut it? 

 **Of course you hadn't shut it, you idiot,**  said a voice in his ear.  **Do you really think that your two-foot-tall disaster ball could have opened it by herself?**

That made sense, but he couldn't, wouldn't listen to his own hallucination, Sam decided. He shut the door and glanced around the cabin again. "Holly?" he called out.

**She's gone, Sam.**

Sam tried to ignore Lucifer, as he willed himself to concentrate — to think. He checked around the sitting area and the sleeping area, and then went over to the stairs leading to the basement, and even down to the basement itself, where Holly was developmentally incapable of reaching. As expected, he didn't find her there.

Which meant…

She wasn't in the house.

Sam had accidentally left the door open, and now,  _Holly wasn't in the house._

Oh, fuck.

Sam rushed back up. No, no, this couldn't be happening… no, no,  _fuck_  no…

"Holly?" he called again, but he'd looked around the cabin already, and it was too small for anyone to stay hidden for that long. So Sam searched another time. He looked in the playpen, in the crib, in the bathroom, and in the basement another time, and behind the sofa and the table and the bed and the fireplace… but Holly wasn't here.

Holly wasn't here.

Sam let it sink in, as nausea bubbled in the pit of his stomach.

 **Uh-oh,**  Lucifer said in an amused voice.  **Looks like your kid ran away, Sammy.**


	2. Their Little Treasure

Dean arrived home to a very frantic Sam. He'd gotten a desperate phone call from his brother while he'd been paying at the cash counter and just the sound of Sam's voice had sent Dean bolting back to the cabin, and then when he'd heard about Holly…

_"_ _I can't find her. I left the door open and I don't know why and she wasn't there and—"_

"I'll be there in five," Dean had said, before cancelling the call, and racing back to his brother.

Presently, he watched as Sam crouched down and crawled under the bed, presumably to look for Holly. Dean sighed. His heart was frantic in his chest and he was trembling and his brain was thinking in crazy circles, but damn if he weren't the calm one right now, because Sam was downright  _mental_. He strode forward and crouched beside the bed, bending over to look at his brother.

"Sammy."

A pair of Holly-like eyes peered at him from beneath long fringes. "Dean. I can't—"

"How are you even fitting in there?" Dean asked his brother, frowning. "Come on out, Sam. She's not under that bed, or in the house, even. I think that's established."

"But — she's… outside, it's—"

"She couldn't have gone far," Dean soothed Sam. He held out his hand. "You gonna come out of that place now, and help me look for her?"

Sam froze, and locked gazes with Dean.

Dean took a deep breath, while keeping his eyes on Sam. If there were two things that Dean's father had drilled into him very well, it was to keep cool during crises like these and figure out all the next steps, and to look after Sam. And Dean was going to do both, for now.

"Shut up!" Sam snarled suddenly, his hands going up to cover his ears.

_Lucifer._

"Ignore him, Sammy," Dean said as nonchalantly as he could, heart missing a beat at Sam's reaction, but his head also clarifying with him, that freaking out some more wouldn't help. "Come out of there, dude."

Sam looked like a kicked puppy when he finally nodded, and Dean was having enough of babying Sam and his progeny by now. But, oh well, the progeny was the most amazing version of Sam that Dean had encountered all his life, so he didn't mind babying her, really. Besides, she was a  _baby_. Sam, however, was Sasquatch-sized, and an entirely different deal.

"She's just a baby, Dean," Sam said frantically, his words mirroring Dean's thoughts as he crawled out from under the bed and dusted his palms against each other. He stood up and brushed the grime off his knees too.

"Yeah, but freaking out won't help," Dean told him as he stood up as well. "If you calm down, we can try and figure out her whereabouts."

Sam licked his lips, ran a hand through his tousled hair, and nodded. Dean patted his brother on the shoulder once, before heading to the kitchen. He came back to Sam with a glass of whiskey, and handed it over. "Drink up."

"Dean—"

"We'll find her," Dean said, as evenly as he could. "Come on, we'll find her, okay?"

"I gotta keep looking," Sam said, fidgeting with the glass. "I can't—"

"Just drink that, Sam," replied Dean. "And then, you gotta tell me what exactly happened when you came back."

Sam blinked, nodded twice, and then raised the glass to his lips, drinking the whole thing in one go. Dean took the now-empty glass from his brother and deposited it into the sink. "Good. Now, tell me everything. From the start. What happened after I left?"

**~o~**

Sam strapped the baby sling back to his chest and went ahead to pick up the blankets, as Dean stopped at the door of the cabin to look at Sam.

"What?" Sam asked his brother, as he slung the blanket bag over his shoulder.

"Why are you carrying all that?"

"It's cold out," Sam replied. "At least I can put her in this and keep her warm when I find her."

"Yeah, dude, or you could hurry back," Dean said. He was carrying a few blankets himself. "You gonna go through strapping her and shit?"

Sam shrugged. "It will be comfortable for her." He didn't mention how he could hold her closer like this, but Dean seemed to take the hint.

"Okay," he said. "Call me when you find her."

Sam nodded. "You too."

He watched Dean walk out and followed, locking the door behind him as he began to retrace his steps to the park. Dean was going out back, into the woods behind the cabin, in case Holly had ventured there. Sam took a deep breath. He just hoped Holly was okay.

"Holly!" He called out into the silent air, hoping she'd hear him and speak up, or indicate in some way, that she was around. "Baby?"

There was no answer.

It was getting dark, the number of people on the streets growing sparse, and Sam dug his hands into his pockets as he kept an eye at the sides and kept calling out to his daughter — but really, how was he supposed to look for a child? Would Holly just be sitting somewhere, lost, or would someone have—

Sam stopped short in his steps.

_Someone could have taken Holly._

If she had ventured out, and she'd been lost, and someone had seen her…

Leviathans.

Could there be any around here? The cabin was a relative safe zone, but what if in the weeks of Sam and Dean's inactivity, the Leviathans had found something? What then? Had they abducted Holly?

No.  _No_.

Sam's walk was turning into a sprint, and before he knew it, he was running to the park.

**~o~**

The woods were colder that the cabin and the park they'd been at, and Dean pulled his jacket closer as he wound around the trees, trying to look for Holly. He knew that if she was indeed out in the snow, she'd be very cold by now, and the whole fact worried him. Dean was aware of hypothermia being related to body surface area, and that it could affect kids faster and worse. Also, the woods weren't a safe place.

Dean just hoped, at this moment, that no one had taken Holly. Because, if that happened,  _oh God_ …

He stopped in his steps briefly and held on to a tree trunk, feeling the fear well up. He had reined in his dread at the cabin for Sammy's sake, but his brother wasn't here now, and Dean shut his eyes and swallowed, as worry filled his pores. He just wanted Holly to be okay. They couldn't afford any more screw-ups in their lives, and Dean didn't think he could handle any of this now.

Dean took a deep breath, rubbed at his face, and took another step forward, deeper into the woods. Seriously, how far could Holly have gone? It wasn't like she could walk a whole lot — she'd get tired and fall asleep at some point. She was bound to. She usually got worn out just after a round at the supermarket, owing to the fact that she'd probably just started walking a few months ago anyway.

So, where could Holly be? Because she wasn't here, and Dean was sure about it.

His heart was beating fast again as he took out his phone. Sam hadn't called, which meant he hadn't had any luck either — but, oh God, Dean just hoped that Sam would be able to find her somehow.

He stopped again, and dialled Sam's number.

Sam picked it up at the third ring. "Anything?" he asked, sounding breathless.

Dean shut his eyes. "Sam… I c-can't… did you…?"

Sam didn't reply, and Dean licked his lip. "Sammy, do you think someone could have found her and handed her to the police? Should we check there? Because I don't know, man, I don't think she could have gotten too far by herself. But if one of those folks at the park or something handed her over to the police… we need to do something about it and—"

He paused, realising that Sam wasn't responding. Oh fuck, what was it, now? Lucifer?

"Sammy?" Dean spoke carefully.

The reply that came cracked Dean's heart into two. "She's not here, Dean," Sam said, his voice subdued. He halted, and Dean heard a hitch in Sam's breath. "Dean, Holly is missing," Sam's voice trembled, and he sounded close to tears. "I lost her." He paused again, and sniffed. "Dean, I lost her."

Sam's tone made Dean snap back to himself. His brother was starting to freak out again.  _Crap_. Dean held the phone to his other ear as he started hurrying out of the woods. "Sam," he said, "where are you?"

"At the park," Sam replied in a broken voice. Dean had rarely heard his giant-sized brother sound so scared or worried. Sam was usually very calm, and he rarely voiced distress and trouble unless it was bad. And this was  _very_  bad.

"Okay," Dean said, big brother instincts taking over all at once. "Okay. Stay there. I'm coming, okay?"

"Please hurry," Sam whispered.

"I am, Sammy."

**~o~**

Sam was worrying his lip to the point that it had begun to bleed, and by the time Dean was there, he could taste the copper in his mouth. His brother was running towards him, breaths puffing out in mists in the chilly air and Sam took one look at Dean before he felt his defences give up, and collapsed onto the bench they'd been sitting on with Holly, just a few hours ago.

 _Holly_. Shit.

"Sam?"

He heard Dean sit next to him, and a hand was on his shoulder, shaking him. "Sam. Hey."

He looked up at Dean devastated. "What do we do?"

Dean pressed his lips together and leaned forward, reaching to Sam's hair, and pulling off the clothespins. He handed them to Sam. "Here. Go back to the cabin. I'll check around."

"But—"

"Dude, you're freaking out again," Dean said. "You really need to simmer down. And the devil screaming in your ear is not helping."

"The devil—" Sam began, but Lucifer waved at him from the corner of his vision, and he slumped. "Dean, I can't just stop looking. What if you miss somewhere?"

"I won't," Dean promised. "And I think someone might have found her and handed her to the police — because I can't see anything else happening. This area is decent, and people have seen us around, right? They might not know where we live, but they'll know she's ours."

Sam shook his head at Dean. "Leviathans."

"Don't you think we'd have known?" Dean reasoned. "Leviathans have bigger appetites than that, Sam, so the only reason they'd take Holly is if they knew she was with us, and if they had, we'd get the memo."

Sam wasn't convinced. He looked at Dean, who bit his lip, as though he was trying to convince himself too. There was silence, which stretched for several minutes, as Sam raked his hands through his hair, trying to think straight. He had no idea where Holly was, or could be, and he felt like he was about to completely lose his mind. And the police seemed like the only option now, but he and Dean were in trouble legally too.

He sighed. "We'll go to the police station together."

"We're wanted, dude," Dean replied to that. "They'll be looking out for us as a pair."

"Think they won't recognise you?" Sam asked him.

Dean reached underneath his jacket, to the charcoal hoodie he was wearing, and pulled up the hood. Sam recognised the piece of clothing, and frowned. "Isn't that mine?"

"You gave it to me," Dean replied.

"No, I didn't."

Dean stood up, and patted Sam once on his shoulder. "You did. Try to remember." He paused. "I'll check in the police department if they have Holly in custody. Otherwise—" He took a sharp breath.

"Missing persons' can't be filed until a day, right?" Sam whispered hoarsely.

"Yeah, but I'll see if I can pull some strings," said Dean. "Sammy, you—" He hesitated, and cut himself short, pushing his hands in his pockets as he glanced ahead.

Sam nodded in response. "Yeah, Dean."

Dean patted Sam's shoulder again, before turning around, and starting to walk to the police department. Sam watched his brother disappear around the corner, and then picked himself up from the bench to head back home. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know how to feel. His life was turning crappier and crappier so quickly, it was like he couldn't catch a break.

What had he done to deserve this? Moreover, what had Dean done to deserve this?

He trudged back to the cabin slowly, his feet heavy. Dammit, he definitely didn't remember giving that hoodie to Dean. But then again, his issues right now were worse.  _Holly. HollyHollyHollyHolly—_

There was a strange sound when Sam climbed up the stairs to the cabin. Frowning, he unlocked the door to a keening mewl, coming from—

_Oh God._

"Holly?"

Sam rushed in, shutting the door behind him, and locking it behind him. "Holly?" Sam scrambled towards the source of the sound. It was definitely from the sitting area, but where was she?

Holly wailed again, and Sam finally realised where it was coming from. He pulled off the sling and threw it on the couch before striding towards the TV, and crouching beside the cabinet. He pulled the doors open, only to be met with the sight of Holly, curled up on her side.

Cobwebs surrounded her and she was crying loudly, her eyes shut. Sam reached out to touch her cheek. "Baby?"

Holly opened her eyes, saw Sam, and let out a big wail, holding out her arms to him. "Faaaaaa'yyy!"

"Hey," Sam said as gently as he could as his heart danced, and he picked his daughter up and held her against his chest tightly. Holly wound her arms and legs around him and sobbed into his shirt, tears and snot wetting the material, but he didn't care. A lump had lodged itself in his own throat, as he felt the overwhelming emotions from throughout the day accumulate and make themselves known. But, he ignored them. He had Holly back.

Sam lifted her, and she was still crying as he buried kisses into her hair, holding the back of her head and bundling her up against himself. He kissed her more, again and again, on the face, on her nose, and then he rested his forehead against hers, tears threatening to fall out of his eyes as he shut his eyes. "You here all this while?" he asked her in a strangled voice.

"J-Jo jo," Holly replied, her voice trembling, and Sam felt a tear of relief slip out of his eye despite all efforts of self-control.

He sniffed as he pulled away from her. "You gave us a heart attack, baby."

Another tear trickled out of his eye, and Holly stopped crying, as she placed a starfish hand on his cheek, feeling the wetness there. She looked at her hand, her mouth in a little 'o', and Sam just held her like that, watching her, marvelling her, as he relinquished control over his tears.

She was startled at that. Her mouth trembled, followed by her chin, and then her whole face crumpled as she began sobbing again. Sam tucked her back against his chest and rested his lips in her hair as he rocked her, quieting her, swiping at own his damp cheeks and whispering sweet nothings into her ear until she calmed down and drooped against him, breathing noisily through her temporarily congested nose.

By this time, Sam was drained of all energy too, and he moved against the wall behind him as gently as he could and rested his head against it. Relief washed over him. Holly was here. Holly was with him.

He shut his eyes and felt himself being pulled towards a comforting darkness.

**~o~**

Dean had had some really shitty birthdays, but damn if this wasn't beating all of those times hollow.

Holly wasn't with the police. No one had seen her. No one had found her and brought her in like he'd been hoping. He couldn't even file a missing persons' report because she hadn't been gone for a day, and…

_Fuck._

How the hell could they have lost her like that? And, no, Dean would die before blaming Sam for this, because he knew that Sam hadn't done this on purpose. The dude was having enough already with his Hell visions and everything else, and of course Dean should have thought this through and gone home with Sam… but…

Oh God. Holly.

He was standing in front of the cabin before he knew it, despair filling every inch of him. What was he supposed to tell Sam? Dean was having a hard-enough time dealing with this as it was, and Sam wasn't doing any better.

Sighing, he braced himself, and put the key in, twisting it as slowly as he could. The door opened, and it was quiet inside. Which was funny, because Dean had fully expected Sam to—

And that was when Dean saw it. His brother was rested against the far wall, his eyes shut serenely as he drew in deep breaths, and in his arms was…

"Holly," Dean whispered, shutting the door behind him and rushing to his brother and niece. He couldn't believe it. Holly was here. Holly was with Sam. Dean knelt down before them. Why hadn't Sam said something? Why hadn't he called?

That was when Dean noticed tear tracks on Sam's face. Sighing again, he extended his hand and gently brushed it against Holly's hair. Then he rested it on his brother's shoulder. "Sammy?"

Sam gasped awake and fixed red-rimmed eyes on Dean as he blinked a few times. "D-Dean?" He looked down, at Holly in his arms. "S'rry, I – I found her … w's gonna tell—"

"You should have called, dude," Dean said, sinking to the floor beside Sam, and leaning against the wall. He understood that Sam had been overwhelmed and panicked, but Dean had been going out of his mind too. "I thought—" he swallowed, and glanced at Holly. "Sam, I thought…"

He couldn't finish the sentence. Sam glanced at him, and bumped his shoulder lightly against Dean's. "Hey," he said softly. "She's okay. And 'm really s'rry, man." He smacked his lips and rubbed a hand against his eyes and his face, before scooping his daughter up. "Here," he said, handing her over to Dean. "Want her?"

Dean did not hesitate before pulling her into his own arms, keeping her tight against himself. Holly woke up with a start and whimpered, but she looked up at him with bleary eyes. Dean smiled at her. "You created quite a racket there." He brushed her hair back and pulled her up by the armpits, kissing her forehead several times, and then curling his own arm under her knees to prop her against his hip so he could stand up. He sniffed as he adjusted her, wrinkling his nose at the familiar odour. "You need a diaper change, babe."

She pouted, and Dean laughed as he stood up. Sam stood up with him and headed to the kitchen as Dean went over to get fresh diapers. He spread a sheet on Sam's bed and placed Holly there before going about his business and cleaning her up, and then cleaning himself. When he was done, Sam was standing behind him with two glasses of whiskey. "Bottoms up," he told Dean, holding out a glass, when Dean had settled Holly on his lap.

She curled into his chest and he rocked her, planting kisses on her head, before accepting the whiskey from Sam. "Where did you find her?" he asked his brother.

Sam glanced at Holly, and then smiled. "Really, man, after we freaked out so much — honestly?" He paused, "The cabinet under the TV."

Dean raised his eyebrows. "What? She was  _here_  all the time?"

"She was sleepy when we got back," Sam said. "She must have done some exploring and fallen asleep in that cabinet." He sighed, "Dean, I should have kept an eye on her, man. I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," Dean said quietly, and honestly. He finished his whiskey and looked down at Holly, who was pressed against his chest, snoozing peacefully. He ran a fond hand through her hair again. "I think she missed us too."

"She was terrified," Sam replied, as he took Dean's glass from him. "Took her a while to calm down. She was stuck inside that thing. And there were cobwebs — so many — we need to clean."

"Cobwebs?" Dean asked his brother.

"Yeah. I checked her, though," said Sam. "No bites. She's okay."

"Gods, we're lucky," Dean sighed. "We're cleaning first thing—" he yawned as he glanced at his watch, "tomorrow." He blinked. "Until then, she," he pointed at the sleeping baby in his arms, "is not going anywhere near any old furniture."

Sam sniggered. "Sure."

Dean held Holly closer, and yawned. "Man, I'm heading to bed. This is officially the worst birthday ever," he sighed, burying his lips in Holly's hair again. Fuck, he had been so, so terrified of losing her, he didn't want to let go of her, but then he wanted to sleep too, and he reckoned he had no choice now. Well, Sam wasn't getting her tomorrow, he thought, smiling slightly.

"Dean," Sam began, shifting on his feet, and Dean knew what he was going to say.

He gazed up at his brother. "Yeah, take her." He was going to extract Holly from himself, when Sam shook his head and placed a hand on Dean's shoulder.

He smiled. "I was going to tell you," he said, "that maybe you should keep her with you tonight." He shrugged. "I'll take your bed. It's not a problem."

Dean swallowed, and looked down at Holly. "Really? You don't think she'll cry?"

"I don't think it matters to her, Dean," said Sam. "Besides—" he hesitated, and then changed the topic. "Hey, don't say I didn't do anything for your birthday."

"Shut up, bitch," Dean murmured softly, settling on the mattress, holding Holly with one hand, and looking around for the covers with the other. He finally managed to lay down with her curled up on his chest, and Sam switched off most of the lights, before coming over helping with the sheets.

"'Night," he said to Dean, as he rested the blankets on Dean and Holly, and then swooped down to peck Holly's forehead.

Dean grinned at his brother. "Dude, you're like a full-on Mom to her."

"Sure," said Sam. "Because I was the one who knew how to sterilise nipples at first."

"Bitch."

Sam laughed, clutching on to the ladder to get to the top bunk. "Happy birthday, Dean."

"Thanks, Sammy."

**THE END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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